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Sunday, August 26, 2012

HOW TO FORGIVE - A 3 STEP PROCESS

By Davida Yemi-Akanle



As long as we live offence will come, and the opportunity to take offence would come to you nearly every single day. It takes maturity not to take offence and with the power of love send the offence away.

Many people want to forgive, but do not really know how to do so. They may ask the question how do I forgive, how do I let an offense go? 

Forgiveness is a choice to let go of another's debt to you, even as God has let go of your debt to him in Christ Jesus.

These are a few steps that may help you clear the slate of your heart, and wash it clean of all stains of offence.

STEP 1: If there is more than one person who might have offended you, writing a list of the names of the people involved might be helpful. Once you've written your list bring this list before the Lord's throne in prayer.

STEP 2: Come to God in prayer, and bring the person concerned and the case at hand before his throne..

a. Tell God what the person had done.
b. Tell him how it made you feel.
c. Tell him that you took offense.
d. Tell him that you would like to forgive them and to let the offense go.
e. Then forgive, send the offense away, and let them go.
f. Pray for them and bless them.
g. Then ask God to forgive you for holding on to the offence, as you have forgiven them. "Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors." (Matthew 6:12)

"If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness".(1 John 1:9)

I would do step 7 over the communion at home, sometimes a physical act, helps you to draw the line, as the devil can sometimes plague your mind with condemnation and guilt saying you have not forgiven. The communion then serves a monument or a landmark helping you to resist those thoughts.

STEP 3: Pray for the person each day, and bless them any time they come to your mind. You may still have strong feelings towards them when they come to mind, but don't let that disturb you, what really matters is the choice you made to forgive them and let them go. As you continue in praying for them, and blessing them, eventually those thoughts that may have plagued you for a while will soon be no where to be found.

FINALLY, as you become more practiced at this, you would not need to go through these steps like you've just done, you would have learnt how to master offence, sending it away with love, blessings as prayer, even as it comes.

Making excuses for others is a great way I have found to do this. Even as Jesus did for us on the cross. He said, "Father forgive them for they no not what they are doing" (Luke 23:34), bless God! Taking offence is a self centered act, we are more concerned about us, than we are about them. Let us be our brothers and sisters keepers, let us make room for, and overlook the weaknesses for others even as God in Christ has made room for us.

Every Blessing :)

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